Friday, December 19, 2008

Doors and Windows

There is a saying, "When God closes a door, he opens a window."

This weekend, I will close the door to my old house. It's hard to explain how I feel about this. On the one hand, I'm looking forward to finally living in my new house (we've owned it for three weeks but haven't slept there yet). On the other hand, I'm leaving the house I can navigate in the dark, where I know what switch works what light, and where if I close my eyes and listen hard enough I can still hear the memories, both good and bad, of seven years gone by.

I'm not walking out forever, I still own it. I'm sure I'll be going back when the renters call about something going wonky (it's an 80 year old house, after all). But it won't be my furniture, or my pictures on the walls.

I'm glad I didn't sell it. I don't think I'm ready to let it go. Maddy even talks about living there when she's "growed up". If I still own it, and she still wants it, then I think it would fantastic.

Life is ever-changing and always evolving, but it's nice to have a piece of the past to hold on to while you're looking out the window toward your future.

9 comments:

My Life My Life My Life said...

Big Hugs!!!

Tattooed Dorothy said...

My dad sold our home (that my great great grandfather built) on the Hill after I graduated high school. At the time, I was happy that he was moving on with my step mom into a nicer, newer home. Now...it miss it terribly. I like five minutes away...but that house holds all of my childhood memories. I even have the longitude and latitude of its location tattooed on my ribs. I think it's great that you're keeping it!

Steff said...

Hi Kim! Congrats on the new house. My husband and I just moved in October and I was sad to leave the old house. It has so many of our first memories. But, I'm enjoying the new place. There are, however, a ton of light switches that I have NO IDEA what they turn on!

Frogdancer said...

Good luck.

Lisa said...

Your last paragraph gave me goosebumps. That was beautifully said.

minniemama68 said...

That's the way I feel about our house. I love it. It is old and almost too small, but it is home.

Zip n Tizzy said...

I think it's great that Maddy wants it, and that you're keeping it, both for her, and for you.
I have lived in the house that I'm in for just under 4 years, and it's the longest I have ever been in one house, even in childhood!

Kelli said...

My Mom sold the house I grew up in when she relocated (I was already in college) and I still miss it so, so much. I miss the sounds, the smells, the memories, the feeling of truly "coming home."
I'm glad you kept it - for the time begin at least.

Congrats on the new move too! Now it's on to new memories!

marmitelover said...

I cannot imagine your pain having to pack away your child's room.
I had to do that to my child's room a couple of years ago when we moved from London to France for a year and she is alive and well. Even so I couldn't stop crying as she was away, already in France.
My greatest sympathy on your loss.